Tonight I went to the Chinese place across the street as I do about three times a week. I walk in, nod to the guy behind the cash register and he turns and barks out some Chinese to the cook in back. "Dong ping wahh. Keem fo poo." Translation: "That douche nozzle from across the street is back getting the same thing for the 800th time". As my order is being made some guy walks in who I've seen about 30 times in the same restaurant. He's about 60, grey hair, flannel shirt, wearing a camo baseball hat and looks like he just stepped out of a coal mine. He walks in, nods and mumbles "same thing". The guy behind the counter shouts out "Bing fo ming, kong bah wat" Translation: "That other older dildo who get's the same thing every night just walked in".
Seven minutes later I have a delicious bowl of steamed chicken and broccoli to go. I love that place. A bargain at $4.95.
I'm on a roll. About 20 years ago I was a photo assistant for some pretty big name photographers. I looked one of them up today who moved to LA to seek fame and fortune, which he actually achieved. On his website he has beautiful provocative images of many famous celebrities. Also on his site are photos of his kids. What is he thinking? Note to all: Everybody loves their kids and thinks they're amazing but putting them on your website is stupid. Nobody else except Grandma wants to see your kids. WTF? Put them on Facebook or Flickr. Not your website you use to get work. Parents, they have kids and lose their minds.
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